Why Looks Matter More While Doing Rishta Proposals in Pakistan?

The search for a life partner, commonly known as "rishta" in Pakistan, often places a significant emphasis on looks. Marriage bureaus in Pakistan are now experiencing serious issues in matchmaking as families care a lot about how a person looks when searching for a compatible rishta. This shift is because of strong family demands and the picky nature of Pakistani society along with factors, ranging from traditional values to societal expectations and evolving beauty standards. 

Even a famous Pakistani drama name "Ishq Murshid" unfolds a captivating tale of love overcoming societal boundaries. Set against the backdrop of contrasting social classes, the story revolves around a wealthy young son of a famous politician (Bial Abbas Khan), who is captivated not just by the outer beauty but the inner strength of a charming middle-class girl (Dur e Fishan Saleem). As the narrative unfolds, the rich boy finds himself drawn to the girl's resilience and warmth, discovering a love that defies societal norms. Amidst the challenges posed by their divergent backgrounds, "Ishq Murshid" explores the power of love to overcome the obstacles and bridge the gaps between two totally different worlds.

In this article, we'll explore why looks matter more in Pakistan when it comes to the process of rishta searching.

Understanding the Change:

In Pakistan, families used to follow a traditional way of finding a match. But now, things are different. Families are becoming more choosy, and they focus a lot on certain things, especially how a person looks.

When people see something pretty, their brain feels happy and excited. This happens because of a chemical called dopamine. When dopamine goes up, it can make them forget about other things for a moment. So, when something looks really nice, it's like their brain gets so happy that they might forget what they were thinking about before. Even forget the qualities of someone who has lesser looks. 

Here we discuss some main points below:

1) Initial Attraction and Chemistry:

Physical appearance often plays a crucial role in the initial stages of attraction, leading to the formation of romantic relationships. Aesthetic appeal can contribute to the development of chemistry and intimacy between partners, fostering a deeper connection in romance.

2) Pressure from Society: 

People in Pakistan feel pressured to meet certain expectations when it comes to marriage. Families want to fit in with what society sees as good-looking. This makes looks a big deal in finding a match. Society often places importance on external attractiveness, and being in a visually appealing relationship can bring a sense of social validation.

3) Influence from Media and the World: 

The media has a big say in what is considered attractive. With access to global media, people in Pakistan now see different beauty standards. This global influence is making looks more important, especially in cities where people are more connected to the modern world.

4) Maintaining Interest and Satisfaction:

While personality and compatibility are vital, physical attraction can help sustain interest and passion over the course of a long-term relationship. For some individuals, personal satisfaction and happiness in a marriage may be linked to the perceived attractiveness of their partner, reinforcing the importance of looks.

5) Money and Changing Roles: 

As people gain more financial independence, they naturally develop stronger control over their personal decisions. This also includes choosing a life partner according to their own comfort and priorities. Because of this new freedom, the focus on looks often becomes a way of expressing personal taste and individuality. Many feel that if they are building a life with someone, they should choose a partner who fits their idea of beauty. At the same time, this preference reflects the modern trend of valuing outer appearance alongside lifestyle choices in today’s society.

The Role of Marriage Bureaus:

Marriage bureaus are now adapting to these changes. While they used to focus on things like shared values and family background, they now also consider looks. They do this because families want partners who fit modern beauty standards. 

Marriage bureaus need to stay competitive. To do this, they adjust their services based on what families want. As families care more about looks, bureaus include this in their matchmaking process.

Technology helps marriage bureaus match people more effectively. Advanced algorithms now consider looks as an important factor. This helps present families with options that match their preferences.

Challenges and Results:

Caring about looks can have both visible and hidden effects on the matchmaking process. While appearance does play a role in first impressions, giving it too much importance can create challenges that affect long-term happiness and the true purpose of marriage.

Superficial Choices: 

When looks become the main focus, people often ignore the qualities that matter in real life, like character, honesty, patience or shared goals. This can lead to decisions made only on outer beauty instead of inner compatibility. As a result, couples may later realize that they do not understand each other emotionally, mentally, or spiritually.

Affecting Self-Image: 

Always trying to look perfect can make people feel insecure. Beauty standards today are shaped by social media filters, edited photos, and unrealistic expectations. When someone fails to match these standards, they may think they are “less than others,” even if they have a wonderful personality. This pressure can reduce confidence and affect mental peace.

Fewer Options for Matches:

Overvaluing appearance reduces the matchmaking pool. Many good proposals which are kind, loyal, respectful, and financially stable are often gets rejected just because they don’t fit certain beauty trends. This narrows the options and makes it harder to find balanced matches that could have led to strong, long-lasting marriages.

Short-Term Satisfaction, Long-Term Struggles:

Looks alone cannot keep a marriage stable. If the decision is made only on the basis of appearance, the relationship may face problems later when real-life challenges come into play, like family responsibilities, financial pressures, or differences in thinking. This results in dissatisfaction and emotional distance.

Conclusion:

In summary, the change in marriage bureaus in Pakistan shows how much importance families put on looks. While it's good to have preferences, it's also important to find a balance. Marriage is about more than just looks. It's about understanding and connecting with each other. The changes in marriage bureaus highlight the mix of tradition, societal expectations, and the new ways people in Pakistan are thinking about marriage.